So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
i was born a porn star she said
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Randomize
