Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
a search helicopter?!
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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