So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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