he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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