I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
