I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Randomize
