I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Randomize
