She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
