I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Randomize
