I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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