finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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