Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Randomize
