I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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