One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
We need to get me chipped asap
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
