you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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