K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I will pee on everything he values.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
