Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
