On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
