I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I have post one night stand depression
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