I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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