Fuck appropriateness.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
