Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
