belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
