I'm really into asian looking animals
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
