Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize