I smell stomach acid.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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