Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
