so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
