Please, let me fuck your mom
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Randomize
