I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
