I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Randomize
