Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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