Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
