Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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