I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
