just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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