I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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