okay pat passed out under dana's car
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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