Dual....:-)
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
