No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
