At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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