idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
