ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
