well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
