If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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