so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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