tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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