Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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