we're blogging at a bar
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
