is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
