okay pat passed out under dana's car
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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